


and then i go and spoil it all by saying something stupid

by jamesdeandickqueen



Category: Queer Eye for the Straight Guy RPF
Genre: Domestic Fluff, First Kiss, Fluff, Getting Together, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Please Kill Me, Possibly Unrequited Love, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-03
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2019-06-21 00:16:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15545394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamesdeandickqueen/pseuds/jamesdeandickqueen
Summary: like, "i love you"





	and then i go and spoil it all by saying something stupid

the rain came out of nowhere. the night sky was such a rich navy blue and then suddenly it was pouring, water spilling through the leaves, dumping down the gutter, splashing beneath each step on the steaming new york sidewalk.

"here, here," antoni's ushering tan through the doorway, large wet hands firm around the soaking shoulders of his sweater. the door shuts behind them as he disappears down the hall, dashing back with a pair of fluffy white towels. one he drapes over his own head like a nun, the other he uses to carefully attempt dabbing tan's drooping hair dry. 

"oh, thank you, love, but it's no use," tan says dejectedly, drops trickling down his temples. "you'll have to see me in my true form again."

so antoni wraps the towel around his shoulders, trying to capture all the dripping rainwater, the warmth of his hands making the thick material almost transparent as he rubs it back and forth maybe a few times more than necessary. "well, come, princess fiona, have a nightcap." 

tan follows antoni to the kitchen where glasses are already out on the counter and he takes that as a cue to sit at the barstool at the end of the island, burying himself beneath the towel. he bunches the ends of it against his chest, using it to dry off his phone screen as he sees antoni out of the corner of his eye somehow shifting about six bottles of booze around in his large arms before he turns to him. 

"what are we feeling?" antoni studies the liquor. "i was planning manhattans, but maybe we should go hot toddy?" 

"i will have a hot anything," tan flashes a smile up from his phone. 

"yes sir."

when the teapot's roaring behind him, it takes antoni a moment to notice that tan has set his phone down and is just watching him as he slices up lemons. despite his shivering, he looks perfectly lively and cheerful, pursing his lips like he's studying. he catches his eye and smirks.

"you want to help, babe?" he doesn't know why he said "babe." christ. 

tan laughs, but he's not sure if it was at the remark or at the suggestion. "if you want human blood in your toddy then sure. i'm just awful at... well," he gestures aimlessly at antoni's cutting board, "all of that." 

"don't i know it," antoni says subtly, eyes falling back to the lemons. 

tan hits him with the damp towel. "little shite!"

antoni grabs his own towel off his shoulders, smiling. "here, i'm sorry, here," he says as he comes around the bar, sliding his hands under tan's waterlogged towel and replacing it with his own. "do you want a shirt or something? you're frozen."

"i'm fine, mother." tan turns to shoot a look over his shoulder at him as he tosses the used towel vaguely towards the bathroom, drawing the only slightly less soggy one tighter around his neck. "i can't take this off anyway, it might cause shoulder dimples. it'll only take days to dry, after all, it's cashmere." 

"oh, that's fine then," antoni furrows his brow. "freeze, bitch." 

"actually, you can dry it a bit faster with a salad spinner," tan offers, as if this is common knowledge. 

"is that what you do with salad spinners?"

"it's not a joke! i use the one with the pull cord..." 

antoni just smiles as tan goes on and on about the delicacies of cashmere care and how that scientifically intersects with kitchen gadgets, so therefore their lives really aren't all that different after all, now are they. he doesn't even have to look away from the countertop to see how animated tan is, flinging rain droplets as he mimes the act of washing something or other, voice nearly squeaking with excitement when he boasts about his discoveries with the rare housewares only europe has to offer. he's barely done explaining what a swiffer sweeper can do for satin sheets when antoni stifles his grin and places the hot toddy in front of him, stirring it lightly with its spoon.

"oh, thank god." tan cuts himself off, a visible shudder running down his arms as he tucks the drink in close between his hands, leaning down to sip it. "mmm. ant, i've got no idea how you make it the perfect temperature every time, but you're a godsend."

antoni sips his own, leaning against the counter. "uh, the thermometer." 

tan's hand slides across the counter and over antoni's, soft skin much cooler to the touch than his own. "i don't know of one single person who measures the temperature of a cocktail. you are just adorable." he pats his hand, beaming, taking another sip. "thank you, really. i'm freezing."

antoni stares down at him, cup between his sweater-pawed hands, damp hair frayed all over his face, eyes blissfully closed as he draws a mouthful between his lips and hums into the hot steam under his nose and practically melts into the mug. his huddled form is delicately outlined against the window; the rain pattering outside has all but stopped by now, the indigo of the night sky painted across the windowpane behind him, faint stars shining almost scarlet in the distance, the moon a deep, warm beam through the fading clouds. 

antoni's absently watching the gray wisps move across the sky over his shoulder as he says, "i love you," under his breath.

he doesn't realize he's said it until tan's sipping stops abruptly, and then he's aware that it _was_ aloud, and the low, placid tone it came out in was _not_ the normal way he and tan say that to each other. a mild terror sweeps through him and he automatically opens his mouth but doesn't offer any explanation, any excuse, it's too late now, he can't even look at him, and what can he say anyway – oh god. 

tan sets down his bourbon, stands up slowly and antoni panics.

"oh, i meant that, like, friendly," he falters. "in a friend way."

tan doesn't walk away, but takes a step around the island to join antoni where he's standing, and that doesn't really help quell his unease. the silence is so fucking awkward and the heat rising to his face is searing and he needs it to end but then tan reaches out and grasps antoni's hands around the drink, brings it up to his own lips and takes a long, slow sip of it.

"you are an imbecile." it takes tan a second or two to actually look up at him, a genuine smile spreading across his face, a shining in his eyes. his hands suddenly feel a lot warmer around antoni's. 

the steam rises off the mug between them as the towel falls to the ground and all antoni can taste is the honey on his lips.


End file.
